Tuesday, May 11, 2010

How can i get it across to my teenagers that thier lives dont suck?

i hear them complain sometimes they say man my life sucks, but i remind them that this is the best time of thier lives, they have evrything, quads, dirtbikes, big boat, rv,, all the great stuff i never had, how do i convey to them that life doesnt really start sucking until your in your late 30s until you retireHow can i get it across to my teenagers that thier lives dont suck?
First of all, life really can suck during the teenage years. Most adults don't realize this, but there is real pain, and stress, and everything else adults deal with. Even in a relatively trouble free life, the homework that gets shoveled on a highschooler causes a similar kind of stress to that of financial burden. They both overshadow your life in the same way, and both have the same kind of potentially long term consequences. Bad finances can mean bad credit can mean no dinner tomorrow. Bad grades can mean no college, can mean minimum wage, can mean no dinner tomorrow (figuratively on both tomorrows of course).





Teenagers work, just like adults, but the difference is, they don't get paid for going to school. If they want money, they need a second job.





Not only that, but teenagers are well aware of the world around them and see the suffering that goes on. They have opinions and ideas, and the troubles of the world weigh just as heavily on them as they do adults.





Kids have to deal with death just the same as adults (I went to four funerals for family members and a memorial for a fellow teenager between the eight and ninth grade) but they don't always have the life experience that might make it easier to deal with.





Not only that, but kids have virtually no rights (they have the right not to be abused, though not all parents acknowledge it, and that's about it) and very little control over their lives, depending upon the parents they have.





The fact is, life can be hard no matter what age you are. People tend to think that the age they are currently dealing with is the hardest, but it starts off difficult as a baby when you can't even feed yourself, and it doesn't get any easier until you die. Even then, you can't exactly hang out with friends on a Saturday night. Life is hard, but it can be wonderful no matter how old you are.





If you're lucky, you learn to see the positive points for your age bracket. If you aren't lucky you go on thinking your life is harder than anyone elses.





If you really want them to understand the positives of their lives, talk to them about people who literally have nothing. Take them to volunteer at a soup kitchen, visit a homeless shelter with a donation, do something to help someone less fortunate (and there's always someone less fortunate) and focus on the great things about their lives, not their ages.How can i get it across to my teenagers that thier lives dont suck?
Take it all away from them!


Don't let them ';play'; with any of those wonderful ';toys'; and let them sleep on the floor and eat rice once a day as thier only meal and wear the same clothes every day day in and day out. No laundry, No bath, none of the comforts they have now and then see how much they think thier lives suck. All teens think that thier lives suck until they're put into a worse situation, it is a phaze and they do eventually grow out of it unless thier lives really do suck but by that time if thats the case it's thier fault not yours
I don't know, because I have 2 of them that think THEIR lives suck too. My oldest was upset because we didn't take a fancy trip for Spring Break this year. Of course, we didn't take one because she had fallen behind in getting her community service hours required for graduation, so she had to do some massive makeup work over Spring Break, since she's graduating in 2 weeks--she forgot about that little detail...LOL





I do think if they can physically SEE those who are less fortunate than themselves, it really helps them to realize they aren't as bad off as they think they are. I'm a big believer in community service, for that reason. I take my kids to homeless shelters, I take them to the group homes for the kids who can't be placed in a foster family, and we volunteer at those places. While the effects of ';wow, we really ARE lucky'; are temporary, they are there for a bit.





I think whining is a natural inclination of the adolesent of the species....hopefully I'll still be around when they get over it! Just know you're not alone in dealing with whiny teens!!
Take them to a third world country to see what sucking is all about. Doesn't have to be very far away either. You can see this level of poverty in latin america and the caribbean. For that matter, you can see this level of poverty on many indian reservations in the US.
it's just teen angst. they all do it, no matter how well off they are. it'll pass in a couple of years.





or if it's really bothering you, you could smack them on the mouth and tell them to stop being ungrateful. (i'm not saying i think you should beat them, but a little smack to startle them doesn't hurt once in a while. i had to deal with that myself and usually i shut up afterward).
You don't. You can try all you want, but they just won't get it until they're older. But keep reminding them anyway.
Take em to a homeless shelter and let them see what it could be like. That should make them see it really don't suck.
teach them about africa, homeless people, and hungry people
Probably the same way you get it across to girls that they aren't FAT.... if you figure it out, let me know.
Love isn't what we buy for our children. A simple I love you will do.
hi Mr mom, don't worry, all teenagers are the same, blue
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